Marriage and Divorce Revisited...

Time to start with a disclaimer. (Unfortunately, this is needed because folks are way to thin-skinned, emotional, and easily offended.) Disclaimer: the following is not an attempt to attack, criticize, or make light of Tiger Woods, Elin Nordegren, their marriage/divorce, or family. It is however, an observation and a commentary, ending with a prayer.

The divorce of Tiger Woods and Elin Nordegren was finalized Monday in Bay County (Fla.) Circuit Court, lawyers for the former couple announced.

"We are sad that our marriage is over and we wish each other the very best for the future," they said in a statement released by Nordegren's Washington DC-based law firm of McGuire Woods. "While we are no longer married, we are the parents of two wonderful children and their happiness has been, and will always be, of paramount importance to both of us."

The statement, which does not divulge settlement terms, says, "Once we came to the decision that our marriage was at an end, the primary focus of our amicable discussions has been to ensure their future well-being. The weeks and months ahead will not be easy for them as we adjust to a new family situation, which is why our privacy must be a principal concern."

That's pretty a clear statement, isn't it? However it reflects several of the problems with how our post-modern American culture views love, marriage, family, and divorce.

Here's more from Ms. Nordegren's interview in People magazine: People magazine claims its reporters spent 19 hours interviewing Nordegren for the cover story which comes out Friday. Her intention, she told the magazine, is to set the record straight and to never speak publicly about it again.

She said she felt foolish that she had no idea her husband was carrying on multiple affairs throughout their marriage.

"Absolute shock and disbelief,” was her reaction to the unveiling of his secret life. “I felt stupid as more things were revealed — how could I not have known anything? The word betrayal isn't strong enough. I'm so embarrassed that I never suspected — not a one.

“For the past 3-1/2 years, when all this was going on, I was home a lot more with pregnancies, then the children and my school."

Nordegren also made it clear that she did not attack her husband last Thanksgiving with a golf club, as he has maintained since the incident.

"There was never any violence inside or outside our home. The speculation that I would have used a golf club to hit him is just truly ridiculous,” she told the magazine.

“Tiger left the house that night, and after a while when he didn't return, I got worried and decided to go look for him. That's when I found him in the car. I did everything I could to get him out of the locked car.”

She added that she hoped one day to forgive Woods.

"Forgiveness takes time,” she said. “It is the last step of the grieving process. I am going to be completely honest and tell you that I am working on it. I know I will have to come to forgiveness and acceptance of what has happened for me to go on and be happy in the future. And I know I will get there eventually."

Whew. That is a lot. However, according to God's word marriage, divorce, family, forgiveness, or life itself is not to be governed by human will or opinion. This situation is just another proof that man, in and of himself, is not equipped to be able to make right judgments about the weighty matters of our lives. In addition to all this, we are also lacking in the strength to carry out the sound actions needed to carry out wise judgment.

Jesus said that God allowed for divorce because of the hardness of our hearts, but that His will was that marriage be a lifetime covenant between one man and one woman, moreover forgiving your spouse is not an option, but a command. To forgive someone who has hurt and/or disappointed you deeply, benefits you, perhaps even more than the offending party. Truly forgiving someone is an act of the will, working in conjunction with the power of God's grace. This opens the doorway to true healing, restoration, and reconciliation in both husband and wife's lives.

In our post-modern culture, however, norms for thoughts and actions are governed by emotion and opinion, as opposed to submission to divine will and authority.

Father, in the name of Jesus, I pray that you would move in the hearts of this broken family. Tiger, Elin, Sam, and Charlie need you like never before. I pray that salvation and intimate fellowship with you through Jesus be their gift that they all freely receive. Lord, when this happens, I know that true forgiveness, understanding, healing, and restoration, will begin. Most of all, Lord, I pray that your will for their lives be done, Amen.

Colossians Chapter 2

The Question Is...

Man is by his very nature an inquisitive being. From the time we are able to speak, we are full of questions (even if we don't always ask them out loud), driving some of our parents crazy! I think it is safe to say, however, that there is no area of curiosity greater than when it comes to our existence, purpose, and its relation to our universe.

Burning question #1 used to be: is there a GOD? Wrong question. Why? "The heavens are telling of the glory of God; And their expanse is declaring the work of His hands. Day to day pours forth speech, And night to night reveals knowledge. There is no speech, nor are there words; Their voice is not heard." (Psalm 19:1-3 NASB, see also Romans 1:18-20) Burning question #2 used to be: does HE love me? Another wrong one. Why you ask? "But God demonstrates His own love toward us, in that while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us." (Romans 5:8 NASB, see also Ephesians 2:1-10). In light of all this love that has been demonstrated toward us, what should be our response? "Love the Lord your God with all your heart, all your soul, and all your strength. Love your neighbor, even as you love yourself."

What does He require? Faith, love, and obedience. None of these are possible in our own strength, but He has provided the means where we can make the impossible, possible. What makes it possible? God's grace. His grace empowers us to abide in Christ, and live lives of faith that are pleasing to Him, causing Him to be glorified.

The correct question instead: is GOD pleased with me? If we don't ask the right questions, we are always going to come up with wrong answers.